In competition with no one but myself

I need to stop comparing my progress (or lack of it) with others.

For some reason, I am feeling less anxious. Ever since our 5-year-anniversary getaway last weekend, I've been feeling much calmer and more assured of myself and the things that I need to do. I guess I don't need to know why (the analytical xena does, though!) - I am definitely grateful for it, so I'll leave it at that.

Wednesday I did laps around the soccer/baseball fields in the drizzle while the son had soccer practice - 40 minutes worth. I was definitely pooped by the end, and I know I've lost some stamina. But it felt good to be moving.

Yesterday I got outside in the beautiful new england fall sunshine to play football/baseball catch and some grass hockey with the daughter. I tackled her needlessly/out of turn and we had a blast.

I'm behind on my practice hours but cruising on my reading/written homework. I need to recruit my friends & family and get some dates/times set for practicing massage on them.

I can't wait to decorate for Halloween - it's my favoritest holiday ever. We pulled the boxes upstairs yesterday and I plan to have my homework done by tonight so that we can do it up, wooboo!

I've come to some clarity about working with "people of size" in my future massage business and the connections to my own struggle with weight issues, my mother/partner/friends being overweight, and the issues of non-judgmental touch. It scares and exhilarates me, but I know my own journey has its purposes. My fear has subsided about my ability to support myself financially, despite the hard facts of therapists I know that have had to return to a corporate job to support themselves, the rising competition, my current lifestyle (living in an overpriced town where I can only afford to rent so that the kids get a great education). I know this is what I am meant to do and I believe that the clients will come and some of them will stay for a spell, or a lifetime.

Today the bf & I plan to bike down to the local cemetary and check out the gorgeous foliage. I am fortunate to live in this part of the country! Maybe the farm stand will be open, too...