No judgment

It's really hard to do. I have been having a really shitty "off" week in terms of things just not going right, and have been using food to medicate those feelings of frustration and annoyance. I had to drive to school TWICE to find out there was no class, and one of the nights had me in absolute tears because I drove through detours that brought me into parts of town that I had no idea where I was, and another detour that took 30 MINUTES to go less than a mile. So I drove through these nightmares to find out that class had been CANCELLED. The parking lot was flooded and obviously empty of cars. There were power lines down (I think tornados touched down in the next town over). I was so tempted on the drive home to stop at fast food or ice cream or get chocolate, but I went home instead and had crab rangoon and general tsao's chicken, which is just as bad. Hey, at least there was broccoli. Oh, and like 3 rum/c0kes. And a cigarette. *sigh*

Yesterday/day before I was feeling very sad, and I'm not even sure why??? But I was trying to feel the feelings. Still had chocolate to compensate, and I was craving a w3ndy's chix sandwich (yes, the fried stuff) after class so hunted down one and enjoyed every single goddamned bite. At least I have been eating salad stuff and beans at lunch, and some fruit, so I am getting marginal nutrition. And my past binges have been SO much worse, so I'm getting better.

I did walk the track on Monday, and I walked last night. I also did sessions both of those days, so at least I'm not stagnating and hiding out completely. I plan to go to the Y tonight, and am feeling better, but right now I am planning a treat of some sort, because you know I *have* to have it. bullshit. But I'm fully intending on doing it anyway, so there. I have counselling today, so that should be interesting...

I'm very very very glad that it's Friday, and I'm looking forward to some beach time tomorrow (it's going to be quite hot here for the next few days). Homework tonight/bit tomorrow, class on Sunday. Have a great weekend, and here's hoping next week is better than this one!