And then it gets hard

Well, the New Year bloom has worn off, and now it's time to do the hard work of keeping up with these goals and exercise. I definitely felt the struggle last week, and acknowledged it for what it is/was. I just gotta suck it up and move on!

I exercised every night except for the icy night (Monday?), mostly yoga. I did a nice long elliptical on Friday night, when the Y was thankfully almost empty and I didn't even have a neighbor on the machines. The free weight room was deserted too, except for a few dudes in & out. I was able to go back to my previous weights level, which made me very happy and amazed me as to how quickly the body & muscles "remember" what they used to be able to do. I was huffing & puffing a bit on the elliptical, but at least I had the resistance on (set at 5; can't remember the highest number it goes to - 12? 15?) this time.

I can feel the difference in my body already, most notably my buddha belly, which is where I always gain weight first. It's unfortunate that I have such animosity towards this poor little guy - so much emotion tied up in a physical piece of me that will *always* be a piece of me, no matter how big or how little. I remember getting a massage about a year ago, and when she massaged my abdomen, I broke into sobs. Why am I so cruel to myself??? To an innocent span of flesh that only responds to what I do to my body. Of *course* it's not going to stay trim and firm if I don't take care of it, and eat crap day after day. It's done so much for me - protected my 2 babies, supported my mellophone-playing days and thousands of belly laughs, been the happy recipient of my bf's kisses, and so on. Wow, I don't know where *that* all came from!!!

Anyway, eating is slowly getting on track. There were 3 days last week that food was provided here at work, and it was challenging to get veggies only. I have some parsnip/kale/black bean for a few meals, and need to figure out what I'm going to have the rest of the week besides salad. I am craving warm, heavy foods due to the time of year and sudden chill we're experiencing.

I did so-so on my goals from last week, and will be having the same for this week. I've already taken my floradil and multivitamin today, have 2 oranges beside me for later snacking, and my parsnip/kale/black bean dish for lunch. I need to fill up my water mug...

Gentle yoga for tonight. Speaking of which, I did a vigorous class on Saturday morning, and was worried about keeping up, given my long break and slow, stiff return, but I did very well and tried hard to listen to my body. It felt good to push a little.

And I start school up on Wednesday, yippee! Hot stones massage class, can't wait. Thankfully it's only 6 weeks and I don't have any other classes, so I should have a thousand-times-better chance at maintaining my clean eating and regular exercise!